For #MC2021: Where I Belong





I really like my home. It has everything I need
I wonder how long it would take me
to find my way home again
This pain that I feel, it’s temporary. Leaving is permanent,‘Til death do us part, my mind echoed
This pain that I feel, it’s temporary. Leaving is permanent
A reminder that existence is like a swan singing and ticking time bombs
Is this where life takes me?

Carefully, I picked out the words I wished to say
Then knocked when I couldn’t wait anymore
You are not defined by your mistakes
The duality of it all, will either lift you high or drag you down

And maybe the universe is unfair that way.
The knocking will never stop

You are led back to where you belong

Quickly and soon enough
I have found my fireflies and they have brought me home.
Everyone who saw me greeted me with a happy smile.
For the first time in many years, I felt tranquility
For as long as I do not fail to forget,
this abandoned house will always be my home.


━MC2022

Para sa #MC2021: Uuwi Pa Rin




Bakit lahat ng bagay ay may katapusan?
Napapaisip ako kung bakit ko ba ito kailangang maranasan.
Tapos na ang ating kwento,
Tapos na ang ating dula.

Inaalala ang mga bawat sandali.
Tatlong bahay ang nilipatan sa loob ng labintatlong taon.
Maraming alaala ang nailagay sa dating walang lamang kahon
Para sa akin napakahalaga ng lugar na ito
Magkakasama sa lungkot at ligaya, ehemplo ang bawat isa.
Paikot-ikot, para tayong mga gulong
...may tulala, tahimik, umiiyak, nakangiti, nagtatawanan, nagdadalamhati, at galit.

Humakbang palabas ng silid
Ginabayan ng nakabibighani mong ngiti
Habang tumatagal,
Lumalayo ako sa realidad
Natatakot sa paraisong balang-araw makasanayan
At sa gitna ng dilim at lungkot ng gabi, naroon siyang nakaupo
Natatakot sa paraisong balang-araw makasanayan
At aking nadatnan ang katahimikan sa siyudad
At sa gitna ng dilim at lungkot ng gabi, naroon siyang nakaupo.
At kapag wala ka nang maramdaman kundi galit, nagsisilbi itong gasolina
Katatagpuin natin ang mga bituin

Habambuhay, ating pagkahabi ang pipiliin
Yakap ng bahay ay hindi mapapantayan.
Sa pagbuhos ng mga bagyo’t ulan,
Nanatiling matatag mula sa kinatatayuan.
...dito ako dinala
Ng aking sariling mga paa
“Kahit saan tumungo, ako’y uuwi pa rin.”

 

━MC2022

Literary: Darating din





Darating pa ba ang araw na babalik sa dati ang buhay?
Darating pa ba ang araw na makikita na ulit natin ang isa’t isa?
Darating pa ba ang araw na makakalabas muli tayo nang walang takot?

Ang hirap maging masaya sa ganitong panahon,
kung kailan libo-libo ang may sakit, at ‘di mabilang ang nagugutom,
habang nanonood lamang ang dapat na tumutulong.

Parang gusto mo na lang makalimot at pumikit.
Pero ito’y mumunting paalala para sa akin at sa’yo,
na huwag mong tatalikuran ang mundo.

Kabi-kabila man ang problema sa paligid,
at tila ang pag-unlad ay puno ng balakid,
huwag mong tatalikuran ang mundo.

Hangga’t may natitirang lumalaban
para sa lipunang walang kagutuman at kahirapan,
pag-asa ay mananatiling nandyan.

Bawat araw man ay tila laging makulimlim,
laging alalahaning matapos ang bawat gabing kay dilim,
Darating ang umagang puno ng pagkakataon.

Mga pagkakataong hindi dapat sayangin,
angkinin natin ang kapangyarihang nakapaloob sa bawat isa sa atin.
Gamitin mo ang iyong lakas para sa mas magandang bukas.

Mayroong pag-asa hangga’t nabubuhay tayo.
Kaya ito ay mumunting paalala para sa akin at sa iyo,
na huwag mong tatalikuran ang mundo.

Marahil ‘di na muling manunumbalik ang dating buhay natin
dahil mas magandang hinaharap na ang naghihintay sa atin.
Darating din.

Literary: Last





Hello! I can’t believe I am doing this. But here I am, writing a eulogy for myself. I am from the past, and you guys attending my funeral—my family, friends, classmates, teachers, and maybe some people that I didn’t even think would come—are basically in the future. I am writing this, not to make you feel sad or scared, but rather to make you feel inspired and alive by enjoying every moment in the present :) Instead of talking about myself and bragging about all of my accomplishments, I will be sharing a few things I always keep in mind to make sure I savor every minute of every day, so you can, too! You don’t have to agree with me, but I will very much appreciate it if you tune in.

Now, let’s get straight to the point!

I do not care about what other people think of me or what they say about me. I do not listen to unnecessary opinions and negative comments about me, and even if I did, I do not let these affect me. Tomorrow is not promised. So, with that in mind, I do the things that make me happy. People will always have something to say, so you might as well do what you want, right? (Except for illegal things, of course.)

Having this mindset makes me feel like a bird set free from its cage! I am able to enjoy life more! So, if you want to dance in public, do it! If you want to sing along with the music on the bus, do it! If you want to wear pajamas to the mall, why not? Don’t be embarrassed, it’s not like anyone will remember this for the rest of their lives. In fact, nobody cares! As long as you are not hurting anybody, don’t be afraid to express yourself. Believe it or not, people are too busy focusing on their own lives. They are not thinking about you, and if they are—well, you have just won because you are living in their mind, rent-free.

In case you didn’t know, I am a dreamer. I have countless goals in my life that I want to achieve and the only thing that is stopping me from succeeding, is me. Our biggest enemy is ourselves. Do not let your fear and self-doubt take those opportunities away from you. If you are afraid of doing something, then just do it with fear! I know it is not as easy as it sounds and it comes with a lot of pressure, but this is your big break to show your abilities and shine. The first few steps might be a rocky road, but I am here to tell you that it is okay to make mistakes—as in, a LOT of mistakes, especially while you’re still young. These are experiences and lessons that will help you grow as a person. So in the future, you already know what to do or what to avoid, and you won’t make the same mistakes as you did in your youthful days.

You don’t have to accept these opportunities immediately, but keep in mind that life is too short to not take chances. You might regret not seizing them later in life!

Perhaps you'll disagree with me on this, but take that risk. This can apply to different situations. Now, I know what some of you are thinking—you’re thinking about your crush, aren’t you? You are contemplating whether to tell them how you feel or not. Every decision you make could either be good or bad. You’ll never know… just as you’ll never know if that person feels the same way about you if you don’t tell them. I know that it will hurt if you get rejected, but there is so much more to life than that person. It’s either you regret confessing because your feelings weren’t returned, or you regret not confessing when they actually like you back and since you did not take the risk, you lost the chance to be together. Tell me, which hurts more?

Now, I’d better keep this short since I don’t want you guys to fall asleep. Haha! I may not be able to give you advice about everything, but that’s okay, because life is for you to experience and figure out on your own ;)

I may be gone now, but I am still with you, in your heart. My life is not perfect and I am certainly not as well, but we can always try to be the best versions of ourselves. Every sorrow, every glee, every tear, every laugh, every mistake, every triumph, every up and every down—they are all part of life. Cherish these moments. Time doesn’t stop. So tell your loved ones you love them, apologize to the people you’ve hurt, fix or let go of relationships, smile at strangers—and most importantly, love yourself.

Know that I am grateful to each and every one of you. You all hold a special place in my heart. I don’t want this moment to end yet, but It’s time to say goodbye. I love you all. Thank you.

Literary: The Right Choice





It took me two and a half years
Trying to hold back drops of my tears
Hurting in ways I don’t deserve
Pushing to finally choose myself

I am sure I did the right thing
We were victims of our own doing
And I know I made the right choice
For this will silence the harsh chaos

But the rain turned into a storm
Here I am, feeling alone and cold.
Why, though, does it not quite feel right?
Nobody has remained by my side

Despite my strive to move forward
I always end up back to the start
Who can pick me up off the floor
Is also the cause of my downfall

But I know a morning will come
Where this pain I’m feeling will be gone
Everything will feel so unreal
Because there are no wounds that don’t heal

When I am finally okay
I will surely look back on today
And thank myself for enduring
The pain I thought was never ending

For the glow and strength I will bare
will be the product of my despair
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