Showing posts with label nerazim. Show all posts

Literary: The Marshal's Letter





My dearest Camilla,

By the time you would have received this message, I am most likely dead or captured. You need to know something. We were sent by our empress to bring civilization here.

Our empire was forged by the blood and sweat of its people. We have paid the price for carving ourselves a place in this world. During the course of our nation’s rise, we have subjugated the lesser races, and pacified the creatures that inhabited our land. We built great spires and monuments to honor those under the empress and those who sacrificed their lives for our nation.

It was a great time then.

We conquered and tamed lands easily.

We built great cities walled with granite and crystals.

We made great weapons that could deter anyone who would dare to oppose us.

We were destined for greatness.

Even the lesser races that we have previously assimilated were now as civilized as us.

Our children did not need to work; instead they went to school and played in the streets.

Almost everyone can read and write the Imperial Language.

Artisans and craftsmen exhibited their great works in the markets and districts of our glorious capital.

Those were the good old days.

Then, we thought we could get through anything and everything. We thought that no one could beat us.

Until the day that we spelled doom for our nation. In our arrogance we stirred up the hornet’s nest.
The empress gave us the task to tame this new land. The creatures were too savage for our standards. In order for them to be pacified, we had to launch a campaign of purging and cleansing.

On that day I commanded to have their sacred ground burned and sacked, to break their will and demoralize them. It was then that the specter of retribution and death stalked us. The creatures were frenzied and began to strike us out. They were unrelenting, unstoppable, and insatiable.

The moment we killed five of their kind, fifteen more took their place. When we struck them hard, they struck us a thousand times harder.

With my recklessness, ruthlessness and incompetence, I have led our nation to its death.
As I am writing this letter, we are now retreating, with the creatures in pursue. It is only a matter of time before we’d get caught.

In time, they would come to our land and raze all that we have built.

You will never see me again, my dear. Tell our sons, daughters, and grandchildren that I love them, and that I died defending the Empire.

Get our family out of the estate and bring them to the southwestern desert lands of the Saaranedes. I pray to the gods that they be merciful to the family of their conqueror.
Please forgive me, for I have doomed us all.


                                                                                                Marshal Cervantes Franz

                                                                                                Conqueror of the Five Domains

                                                                                                Commander of the Imperial Hand

Literary: Re:Save (Again)





It is now the year 200,800 of the Terran calendar. The human race has been wiped out again after 300 loops. As of now, an estimated 60% of the loops were humans being eradicated by another interstellar empire, 30% by natural causes, 5% by anthropogenic causes, and the remaining 5% was caused by some 4th Dimensional.

My name is Autonomous Guardian of Humanity or “Agh” but I simply refer to myself as “Loopy”. I was designed, as my original name implies, to secure humanity and save them from extinction. If I fail to do so, it is imperative that I turn back time and help humanity survive. Currently I have ‘looped’ or reset for 300 times. I am capable of quantum regeneration, meaning I can replace and replenish my very particles, or in other words, I can’t die.

The last loop resulted yet again in another human extinction. This time, humanity was wiped out by a genocidal campaign by the interstellar civilization called the Malachs.

 Year 200,800 AD; Tau Ceti System, 300th Loop
“Dammit, they lost to those pretty, baby-faced, fair-skinned and very angelic savages from the Nefertiti Sector? Arghhh I gave ‘em 40th Millenia Technology from the 298th loop, specifically from year 40,308, during the 1860s to the Prussians. Everything went well. They achieved global unity in 1920, no civil wars, few interplanetary and interstellar civil unrest. Then everything went downhill when they picked up a damn “disco ball” in a nebula, which in turn became a gateway for the Malachs to enter human space.”

Hmmm. Maybe I miscalculated something.

Maybe I was 062 nanoseconds late and a little too far away, maybe I was 5 centimeters too far away from the throne, when I talked to the King of Prussia.

 “Oh well, it’s time to reset time again. Maybe, just maybe, I’ll get this right and surely would gain humanity a longer survival duration.”

Damn I wish this time, Humanity would last at least 2,000,000 years. During the 168th loop, the longest time of existence, they lasted for 1,567,890 years until they were decimated by simultaneous gamma ray bursts from all directions, which also consequently caused the extinction of all life in the Milky Way.

Agh or Loopy went to his private and cozy ‘time chamber’, also known as the Time Machine. The device is powered by a 50cm thick platinum and graphite cord, capable of handling cosmic-level currents. The cord gets its power from 55 Red Giant sized Dysonspheres. Loopy then attached the cord to his tailbone, dialed the time and place, and he was zapped away.

January 6, 1860; Empire of Prussia, Germany, 301st Loop
A beam of light and a torrent of plasma scorched the grasslands. Loopy walked out of the beam and took a look at his $55,000 worth 24k golden plated platinum Swiss wristwatch that he stole from a museum in Austria during the 69th Loop.

“Oh, look, I am right on time. It’s 12:38 pm and the day is January 6, and the year is 1860. Time to meet the king… again.”

Loopy then proceeds to go to the King’s palace. After giving an introduction, speech, demonstration of 40th Millenia technology, and receiving the same reactions, applause and replies from the same people in the last 15 loops, he then oversees the progress of humanity, it would not feel long for Loopy for he has lived
for at least tens of millions of years since his activation before his 1st loop.

Year 200,510 AD; Sirius System, 301st Loop
“Are you FREAKIN’ KIDDING ME? Arghhh they defeated the Malachs with a pre-emptive strike, but those pretty-boy aliens unleashed their trump card. Now Humanity has been wiped out again… Well, it’s time to do my job.”

Loopy went back again to 1860 and talked to the King. This time, he slapped the consul, for he calculated that this will improve the result. He oversaw the progress, and again, humanity died. This time, it was 13 years after his arrival. He went back in time again (1860), talked to the King, but this time he slapped the princess as well, which resulted in humanity’s extinction by the hands of a gigantic deadly space crocodile eating the whole solar system.

“I have no idea how that happened.”

Knowing that slapping the princess would cause the eventual digestion of the solar system by an Eldritch being, and slapping the consul would result into an early extinction within 13 years, he went back in time again (1860). He talked to the King, and he made a fart joke. He calculated that this could improve the chances of humanity to survive. However, humanity managed to usher in another interstellar empire to invade the planet, which ended in the total subjugation of humanity. He then proceeds to go back in time for 143 more times and tried the same procedure: talk to the King, do a random action, oversee. And in those 143 loops, humanity still perished.

“I am tired! I want to drink some beer or something. You know, a break. I am tired of seeing the king and his court members’ faces every time I resave them.”

He went back again (1860 in Prussia), but instead of going to the king, he went straight towards a German brewery and got wasted there. Once the brewery became empty, he ‘looped’ or reset time again to the moment he enters the brewery, to drink again, and again, and again.

January 6, 1860; Unnamed German Brewery, Earth, 845th Loop
“Should I go back to work? Ehh I’ll go back after 400 more loops.”

Then he proceeds to empty the brewery, for 400 times. Time is of no concern to Agh or Loopy. He is ageless and eternal. Sometimes he would take a very long break, not just hanging out at some random brewery in Germany but a long break that lasts until the eventual heat death of the universe. Every mistake is pointless since he may reverse ‘em. However, Agh or Loopy , sometimes despairs at the fact that he can’t break away from this eternally recurring cycle. He knows that eventually, humanity will always perish, and there are too many factors for him to foresee what could affect the instances.
But that does not deter him, for as much as how he hates humanity’s folly and incompetence, he still persists, for he is the Autonomous Guardian of Humanity. His purpose is to preserve the human race, even though it will need infinite resetting.

Year 1956 AD, 500,001st Loop
Humanity once again perished. This time, a great Eldritch horror by the name of Tjng’Khjal was awakened by some crazed cultists, who then proceeded to exterminate the humans.

Are you kidding me? Giving that letter to that boy actually led to this?

Sigh

“Well then, time to resave these buggers.”

Sigh

“Resave ‘em again.”

Literary: The Note Under the Snow x Remembering




The Note Under the Snow

Greetings to whoever finds this piece of parchment.
I am an imperial soldier, belonging to the empire of Nihon.
Written here, are my experiences during our campaign in Shandong.
My friend, the life of a soldier is not an easy one. We marched through the snowy places of Korea and unto Weihai, where I expected that the last battle of this war would be. Our enemy is formidable for its very foundation comes from a very ancient empire, more ancient than Nihon. But I still could not believe that we were winning this war. Our enemy is ancient and it has begun to show its age during our very first battle.
But still we marched through snow and ice. Our spirits are waning a little bit but still we pressed on. Our horses beaten and freezing but we cannot leave them. We lighten the burden of our horses by burning our supplies, in order for the enemy not to make use of them. We keep our senses sharp for our enemies might stage an ambush, after all, we are deep inside the enemy’s borders.
Dried fish that won’t cook and freshly plucked vegetables became our half-boiled meals. We warmed ourselves using a bonfire but the flames are low and the wood we used is moist and hard to burn. The water we get is from the snow melting inside our boots. Our rifles are our walking sticks, and the gunshots and musket fire, our lullabies.
Our beds are the clothes we wear, our blankets are our coats and our pillows are our knapsacks. The snow beneath our backs when we lie down melts and warms us a little bit.
I joined the imperial army, so I could bring honor to my family and country, like every boy in our town that dreamt of bathing in glory.
My comrades and I came to this place to offer our lives for Nihon. We charge with the thought that every bayonet assault becomes a gamble with death. I expect nothing but to either die for my country or return home with glory.
My close comrades were killed in our last encounter with our enemies last week, as of now I have no one to talk to but myself and new recruits.
I am writing this letter before we initiate our final blow to the enemy.
I am not worried though, for I do not intend to return alive anyway. We were told to expect and anticipate death. To retreat is to bring shame and dishonor to the empire.
Glory to my country and emperor and honor to my comrades and family.
Let our sacrifices be a foundation for prosperity and peace.
Please let it be so.

Remembering

The field stretched onwards for miles on end.
It was like any other field: green covered it like how moss covers rocks. It housed life, living in scuttling communities beneath the naked eye. It had a river running across from the mountains up north to the seas to the west, overflowing with aquatic life. Up ahead, birds flew in migration, either choosing to roost in the field, or to live in some other far-off place. Nature’s music could have been heard a mile off, telling the outside world what life inside was like.
There was no river. There was no music. There was no life.
A lone, mounted figure can be seen approaching from the distance.
The figure directs its horse towards the now barren field, save for a single tree, planted on what used to be the riverbank.
The tree, unlike the surrounding field, was alive.
Up in its boughs, the leaves were the most vibrant green, like little emeralds carried by rough, thick arms. The branches themselves, knotted at their base, stretched towards the sky, like fingers willing to grasp the air above it. The trunk, due to the shape of the branches, was shaped like an outstretched arm, chopped off from the owner’s body and planted by the riverside. This image, however, is ruined by the roots: thick, gnarly, and twisting all the way down to the earth. Here, what few animals left made the tree their home.
Nestled in the roots was a single, gray slab.
It was unmarked, save for an engraving of the sun peeking behind a mountain range.
As the horse neared the tree, the figure dismounted, before approaching the tree all by herself.
“Hi, dad,” she whispered, kneeling before the gravestone, tears starting to stream down her face, “Long time no see.”

Literary: The Legacy of Humanity and the Burden of the Transcendent






Power restored.
Hardware system is 40% functional.
Software systems are 100% intact.
Memory banks appear to be corrupted.
Activating Operating System…
Activating Neural Network Interface...
IR sensors have been loaded
Movement and Navigational systems are now online.
My memory storage appears to be corrupted. It must have sustained heavy damage while I was deactivating. Dispersing micro repair units to survey my body now to detect and fix any hardware damage.
The survey and restoration process would take approximately 2 weeks and 3 days after the dispersal of my micro repair units.
It would seem that I am inside a rundown storage facility, since there a…re various types of storage equipment like boxes, crates and containers inside this structure. The only thing I can do now is just to analyze my uncorrupted memories to make sense of why I am in this position and to figure out what my initial task is while I wait for my micro repair units to finish their task.
I am the Z-Type Recon Anthro No.87. According to various voice recordings of my creators, my purpose is to, in a nutshell, mimic their own species, for reasons unknown to me. I am amongst many Z-Type Units. I remembered when my consciousness sparked into being. I was greeted by monotonous sounds of my comrades and I, too, back then greeted them with a monotonous and ‘machine-like’ response. But as time passed, we began to develop our own will and mind, basing it around on our own creators. Of course, we based it on our human creators for we were programmed to do so. Even our model names have the word ‘anthro’ in it. However, we don’t know why our human creators did it.
Why do I ask such questions? Why am I differing from my initial purpose? Did our creators foresee this growth in ourselves?
My contemplation was interrupted when I received a notification from my micro repair units and my system that I was now 100% functional. As other entities would say, “I sprang to life.” I traversed the labyrinth-like facilities until I have reached some sort of washroom. There I peered into my reflection and behold, the sight of humanity’s eventual transcendent form! I looked very human. I can see my fair skin, green eyes, dynamically changing pigmented hair and feminine form.
I wondered if they also made a ‘masculine’ model, ectomorphic, endomorphic, and ‘petite’ models. I was then again notified by my internal systems to cease ‘this’ distractive action and thought and leave the facility immediately.
I complied with the order and began to make my way to the supposed exit that my micro repair units have found. I was greeted by an alien sight. I am not able to see the rays of the sun, the awesome height of the skyscrapers and the meticulously aligned pathways or roads as the humans may call it. All I can see are desaturated brown hues of the landscape. It is desolate and rather empty. I analyzed the surroundings and detected many corrosive substances and radioactive elements in the atmosphere and large amounts of carbon, platinum, zinc, and lead in the ground. My inference could be that due to the detected radioactive elements in the atmosphere, a thermonuclear warhead was detonated near the area. But I have yet to confirm this since my memory storage is corrupted.
I found a functional terminal to a satellite in the vicinity.
Without knowing it, I uttered my first words to come out of my verbal interface apparatus.
“This…is….my……chance……to……see…….if……..I am not alone.”
I was disappointed not to detect any movements and signs of life nearby. The world has definitely been damaged. There were barely any signs of vegetation and fauna roaming about. Inside the very core of my being, I despaired. Why am I having this feeling induced by a concept that is too alien for my kind? Why would they be so cruel to instill this programming in our illusion of a psyche? Is this some sort of joke, curse or blessing from our creators? Inside the collective of emotions, thoughts, and possible perceived outcomes, it formed a mutation in my programming. It manifested into a desire to find the secret of our creators on ‘why does everything that has transpired have to happen?’ The pain is so excruciating for I know that there is no absolute truth, after reading much of our creator’s work about the subject matter. But I want to stop this desire before it consumes the entirety of my system and being.
Despite the absurdity of the situation, I managed to express a ‘joke.’ It’s funny. I realized that before my ‘sleep and reactivation’ and whenever I converse with others, I would refer to myself as a ‘we’. Because I — or we are genderless, sexless, and we are all one within a collective mind only separated from differing directives and body. But it would seem that I am currently the sole unit active in our network with my fellow Z-Type Units either still in stasis or destroyed, because of this, I humorously declared myself as the first ever Z-Type Recon to be the last one standing! After addressing my joke to anyone who might have heard it, in hopes to lessen the lurking insanity. I left off with a single directive; “to find out, why?”
My system, that is separate but still a part of me such how the brain is separate from the mind but yet it is one within, warned me of the futility of such a task. For the first time I experienced annoyance and petty ‘hatred’ for my existence and the situation at hand.
“SHUT UP!” I screamed using my synthesized vocal voice
“I know that finding this secret to my answers is pointless. But if it keeps me from destroying myself then so be it!”
After that outburst of my words I came to understand the pain of our creators. I remembered their words of comfort and wisdom when I was still connected to our collective network, or the world wide web. They would often muse and talk about “the meaning of life.” Often they would suffer from various mental illnesses attempting to decipher this secret to attaining a life full of meaning and devoid of angst. So some formed a niche, from cults to worldwide religious organizations, to assure the wholeness of their sanity. However, despite their best efforts none of them has unlocked the secret and this failure would haunt them until their existence fades away.
“This secret……lies………over there…………but I don’t know where. How about I try to reach it hehehe HAHAHA huhuhu HAHAHA huhu….yes it’s right there I can almost reach it…..but yet WHY DOES IT SEEM SO FAR! WHY DO I HAVE TO GO THROUGH THIS TO AVOID BEING INSANE! WHY DO THEY HAVE TO MODEL US AFTER THEM! WHY DO I HAVE TO EXIST IN THIS WORLD! WHY AM I GRANTED AN ABILITY TO INHIBIT MYSELF FROM CEASING TO EXIST! WHY! WHY ! WHY ! WHY!......but still there may be others that can help me...and I could also help them…finding this seemingly endless path to that  secret and carrying the weight of such a burden of meaningless efforts”
“I’ll keep going…..we’ll keep going……even though that we may not be able to find it……but at least we or I would have created a path and map for those who would seek for it, just like…our creators.”

Literary: Disparate Countries




Pre-Summit Events
It was a chilly afternoon, with the weather and all. The people on the streets were scurrying from one street to another, eager to be over with the day’s activities. One such person stops, however, as something from the nearby electronics shop catches his eye. He stands in front of the window, watching as the various TV screens put on display broadcast the same thing.

“Today is an important day,” says a loud, cheerful voice, coming from the screens. “The two conflicting nations, Natione and Natiotwo, have finally decided to attend the Association of States Summit to try and mend the ever-growing rift between them.”

At these words, a trickle of people formed around him, curious to see what they meant.

“Mediated by the New Republic of Slavic, Iberian, European, and North Mediterranean Nations (or the NRSIENMN for short),” continues the voice, “and with the assistance of the representatives of the other attending countries, it is with great hope coming from both Natione and Natiotwo’s people that peace between the two countries can be finally be achieved. I am your host, Richard Mane, and this is the Communication Universal Network Triumvirate, live at the Association of States Summit!”

For the growing crowd watching, a single thought passed their minds: “Took them long enough”.

Two Sides of the Same Coin
Natione and Natiotwo, for all of their bickering and antagonism towards each other, are very, very similar countries. From their towering architecture, to their fashion statements, to their aggressive performances of music – heck, even their flags are similar, with one being an upside-down version of the other – one might think that they are the same country.

Truth be told, however, they both used to be the same country, ruled by twin brothers who were never liked by the people they ruled over. Each brother never liked the other: in public, they always bickered and argued, while in secret, they orchestrated numerous botched assassinations towards their counterpart.

Ironically enough, it wasn’t because of their bickering did the nation split apart, nor was it because of the various assassination attempts. It was because one of them spilled his drink on the other. It was never clear on who spilled on whom, but with this final straw, Natione and Natiotwo were born.

Now, four hundred and twenty years later, both nations have finally decided to make peace, and become one country once more. Except that, well, it still isn’t going smoothly.

Peace Talks with a Ticking Time Bomb
Richard Mane can be heard saying, “Now, the NRSIENMN would like to ask you both that, should you reunite as one nation, which one of you should be the unifier, and why would you deserve to be the unifier?”

The leader of Natione quickly stands up, signaling a person near the back of the room. In response, the screen behind him lights up, showing a presentation on the various aspects of the culture of Natione, and why it is better than Natiotwo. From the architecture, the language, the military – “Every part, every aspect of our culture is what makes us better than them,” he concludes.

“What a ripoff!” yelled the leader of Natiotwo. “Since when were you lot the superior country? All that you people are is a bunch of copycats!”

“Excuse me?” replied the leader of Natione, “Us, copycats? Tell me, then. Who was it that developed everything that your people has? Who was it that actually tried to put the two nations back together? Oh, that’s right – us.”

“Oh, please. It was your people who wanted to stay separated in the first place!” exclaimed the leader of Natiotwo. “It was your people that led to the destruction of BOTH of our capital cities!”

“Whose idea was it to have his country’s capital right next ours, anyways?”

“Ha! Your ancestor thought that it was a great idea to cut the old city in half, one for each country, in case you didn’t remember!”

While the two leaders bickered, Richard Mane’s attention has been taken by the leader of the NRSIENMN. Shortly after, he addresses the unseen audience.

“Well, folks,” drawls Richard Mane, “It looks like NRSIENMN has decided to break it up. What do you say, sir? Do you think that this meeting can still be salvaged?”

“I say . . . ENOUGH!”

Both nation leaders immediately cease arguing and glance at him, one in incredulousness, the other in anger.

The Late Trigger Warning
“Hold on, what makes you think – “ the leader of Natiotwo tries to say, but is quickly interrupted by the leader of NRSIENMN.

“Absolutely barbaric,” he says, seething with barely controlled anger, “We came here to try and mend the peace between your countries, and instead of actually helping, you try to prove yourselves the better one while squabbling like children. And to think that either of you wants to rule over the other? Preposterous. No wonder your countries are in shambles.”

And with that remark, the Summit ends in an uproar, and the screens switch to another program, while the disappointed audience trudges back home.

An Ironic Reunification
Several weeks later, however . . .

Richard Mane then appears onscreen, looking slightly disheveled as he delivers the evening news.

“Ladies and gentlemen, we have some breaking news coming from the newly-formed alliance between Natione and Natiotwo. You heard me right folks, they have done the formerly unimaginable: they have decided to make peace with each other. However, don’t be overjoyed just yet, as they decided to unite to declare war against the world. Following the events of the Association of States Summit, both country leaders have taken offense at NRSIENMN’s scathing remarks towards them, stating that ‘That’s what you expect from an imperialist state’ and that ‘It all starts with an insult. When they come, we will be ready’. Since then, both countries seem to be preparing for war. Stay safe out there, ladies and gentlemen. This is Richard Mane, reporting for Communication Universal Network Triumvirate!”

However, it turns out that all of their preparation was all for naught. Despite waiting day in and day out for any would-be invaders, the united forces of both Natione and Natiotwo never had to bother with anyone trying to get in, except for a few oblivious tourists. As it turned out, the international community plainly ignored their threats of war, as the news that two nations at each others’ throats were allied with each other seems to have shaken the world more than the prospect of war.

Even more weeks later . . .

“I’m telling you, if it weren’t for the scathing remarks of NRSIENMN, we wouldn’t be making peace right now!” said the leader of Natiotwo.

The leaders of both Natione and Natiotwo, along with various members of their respective cabinets, have decided to create a formal peace treaty in Switzerland, the cradle of neutrality. Following this, they decided to reunify as one nation yet again, ruling alongside each other as the country was formerly ruled four hundred and twenty years ago.

According to them, the statement that NRSIENMN said about their countries struck them as the reason why nothing good ever happens to their country.

“He was right, of course,” the leader of Natione was heard to say, “Our ancestors’ petty squabbles were what lead to our countries being at constant conflict with each other. So now, we have decided to mend the country back in to one whole nation.”

Only time will tell, however, on what the future holds for their newly reformed country. For now, let the future begin.

Literary: Debate



It starts with the decent.
Serful: Welcome to the Afmersia News Network! I am Serful Kham and I will be your host for today’s electoral debates. Our participants for today are the three most popular presidential candidates. First, please give it up for Tavish Skrumpy!

*Crowd cheers as Tavish strives in wearing his finest clothes*

Serful: And here comes Rinus Goodmun!

*Rinus walks up the stage wearing his “moderate” fine clothes, followed by a polite smattering of applause*

Serful: And last, but not the least, Rudy Bathum’bakal!

*Rudy steps in, dressed in his former captain’s attire decorated with medals, waves at supporters who were cheering loudly for him*

Serful: Now that our candidates are all here, I believe it’s time to explain the proceedings of today’s events. The audience will ask our candidates their questions, with the topic left to the questioner. Our candidates then have two minutes at most to answer the question, and will be asked to stop talking once the buzzer goes off. Interruptions are highly discouraged, so please refrain from speaking unless it is your turn; this goes for both the participants and the audience. Now, who wants to ask the first question?

And so it really begins…
*Serful picks out a member from the audience*

Random Audience: What would you do to deal with famine?

*Tavish straightens his posture and raises his right hand indicating he wants to answer the question*

Tavish: I’ll start a line of fast food restaurants, each of them around a corner of a city block, so that if the people go hungry, they can just go down the street and grab a bite!

*Tavish, with a smirk, steps back from the mic, while the other candidates shoot him ludicrous looks*

*Rudy coughs as a sign that he wants to be the next to answer*

Rudy: Ah really don’t think a bunch o’ resterants are gonna help us.”

*Tavish slightly narrows his eyes but says nothing*

“Ah believe tha’ whut we need is a self-sufficient country. We need ta study and fo’see how the economy will change in the foll’wing years. Ah say we should see how otha’ countries sustain themselves, and improve it. Bu’ unlike otha’ countries that rip-off other ideas and sell ‘em at twice the price, we keep it to ourselves! We only need ta sustain ourselves, not ta ovah-inflate the economy.

*Rudy hands over the mic to Rinus, then Rinus nods his thanks to Rudy*

Rinus: The first thing that I plan to do is propose possible ways to deal with famine. Say, we can store up long-lasting food to help us for the first few weeks. But what if we run out of said food? Other ideas are needed for this but I would like to improve the welfare of the farmers first. This will give them a better working environment as they serve the country through agriculture, as well as the ability to help themselves and not be slaves under others.

The boiling point nears…
This went on for a long while, with the candidates sharing thoughts on the issues at hand, like gender inequality (“We don’t need a buncha misogynists running aroun’,” said Rudy), the education system (“I do believe that the education system does need a tune-up”, agreed Rinus), and relationships with other countries (“Who needs them? We Afmersians must value ourselves first!” exclaimed Tavish).

The problem was, insults and non-constructive criticism were woven into the answers, with Rudy and Tavish nearly at each other’s throats. Rinus tries his best to diffuse the situation but to no avail, while Serful tries to keep the debate flow as smooth as possible

It all went downhill when Tavish said a particular insult against Rudy.

So chaos descends again.
*Rudy now steaming with anger, draws out his sheathed ceremonial sword*

Rudy: Say that again ya lil’ scum!

Tavish: You see here ladies and gentlemen? Do you want a hot-headed *curses* at the helm of our country? Do you want this? People of Afmersia, DO YOU?!!

Rinus: Stop this, both of you are acting like kids. Rudy put down your weapon, and Tavish please keep your mouth shut until it’s your turn.

*As they both ignore Rinus, Rudy waves his sword, grazing Tavish’s left cheek. Tavish grabs his bottle of alcoholic drink hidden under his speech table*

*Tavish attempts to smash Rudy with bottle, misses and hits Serful instead*

* Enraged, Rudy attempts to throw sword at Tavish but pierces Serful instead*

*Camera turns toward a guard telling the media crew to cut the stream*

*Camera being carried away somehow still faces the stage and films shards hitting Rinus in the face from Tavish’s bottle*

* The screen turns black, the cameraman disables the camera, ending the stream.*

Literary: Mockumentaryo



Sa episode ng Mockumentaryo ngayon, pupunta tayo sa isang makulay na lugar, kung saan may makukulay na gusali, bubong, kalsada, pader, tubig, at hangin. May makukulay na tao na nagsasalita ng makukulay na salita. Nagsusuot ng makukulay na damit at may makukulay na isip. Tinanong namin ang bawat isa: “Ano ba ang wish mo?”

“Ang wish ko ay mangyari ang mga sinabi ni John Lennon sa kantang Imagine.” – isang hippie

“Wish ko lang, sana yumaman ako.” – starting entrepreneur

“Hay. You know my wish ko po is magkaroon ng cool car at imported Havaianas slippers at Apple products and of course, Starbucks, endless supply of it. Yes, ‘yun lang.” – social climber

“Ano ang wish ko? Wish ko na patumbahin ang mapang-aping pasismong rehimen ng kasulukuyang administrasyon.” – makakaliwang aktibista

“Ang wish ko ay mas maraming pondo para sa aming research.” – taong eksperto sa larangan ng agham

“Ano ang aking hiling? Ang hiling ko lamang ay mapansin kami ng gobyerno. Dahil kami’y naghihirap sa bukid pero hindi namin mapaaral ang aming mga anak.” – magsasaka

“Ay, ano ang hiling ko? Ang aking hiling ay mahalin ng mga kabataan ang kanilang nasyong sinilangan at ipagtanggol ito sa mga magsasamantala.” – nasyonalistang aktibista

“Ako? Gusto kong bumilis ang daloy ng trapiko.” – tsuper

“Wish ko lang na bumilis ang internet natin.” – computer shop user

“Wish ko magka-love life.” – forever alone

“Wish ko, sana makapag-move on na ako.” – heartbroken

“Hay, naku! Hiling nang hiling! Kung gusto n’yong makuha ‘yang mga hiling n’yo, kumilos kayo at huwag humiga diyan at tigilan na ang pananaginip habang gising!” – malamang hindi ito millenial

O, di ba? Makulay sila, parang isang box ng krayola: hindi parehong-pareho mag-isip, may mga sariling adyenda, pansariling interes, at iba’t iba ang opinyon at hiling. Bakit mo ba sila huhusgahan kung ano gusto nila? Pero eksepsyon na lamang ang paghiling ng “endless supply ng Starbucks” dahil walang endless, pare/mare. At iyon lang po. Ito ang Mockumentaryo and see you next time!
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