Literary (Submission): Maybe Someday (The Other Perspectives)
(Read Maybe Someday here.)I knew she would see us today as we were at the stone bench by the school gate. I don’t normally stay this late, especially not to hang out with you or your teammates. But I made sure my presence was felt more strongly today. I was feeling unintentionally rejected because despite my obvious flirtations, you were awkward, silent. Deep inside, I wished I left earlier.
* * *
But I had to do what I came to do. I purposely sat beside you. As close as the stone bench would allow. And animatedly told you about stuff I was certain you'd find interesting, hoping that even just for one bit, you would listen intently, that my scripted rehearsed conversation would merit more than a polite smile, which I knew wasn't even for me.
* * *
My plan worked! Word got around fast that there was something between us. And yes, I take all the credit. For after just weeks of texting you, talking to you randomly, spending time with you, making you -and most specially her- think that we were getting along really well (and were bringing back what we could have been in the past), you were under my spell. I don’t care what your friends say about me. I don’t care what she thinks. I know what I want. You.
* * *
But you. You weren’t buying my staged drama so I had to move on to phase 2. I leaned closer to you, hoping this gesture will bring you back to my show, bumped your shoulder playfully to catch your attention. And pleasantly, it caught hers, too. Surprisingly, you put your arms around me, and even if it was just for a split second, it was soooo kilig. I wanted to believe I succeeded. But you - her stare sent you the same feeling.
* * *
What is wrong with you? We look a lot better together than you and your telenovela loveteam! Can you blame me for liking you more ever since the idea of you getting along with somebody else, even as a joke, got around? So i had to let you know sooner that for the longest time, I've had my eyes only for you. That you have always inspired me, made me happy because of the little things you do. And deep inside, I have always wished for an 'us.'
* * *
So I made my move. Confident that you cannot resist my charm, my obvious flirtations, my sincerest feelings for you. My friends back me up saying we really look good together, that you’re slowly falling for me, that your littlest gestures speak a lot about what you are not saying, or cannot say, but I would definitely love to hear.
And so I asked you.
* * *
Though your emotionless smile hit my nerves and tugged at painful heartstrings, I know what I want. And I will make sure you realize that you are better off with no one but me. She doesn't like you. You do not have a chance with her. Why hold on to hot-cold uncertainties when I here I am, sure about what I feel about you?
I saw her walk past us. Not even a glance.
Admit it, it's over.
I tug you closer.
I saw you glance at her.
I smile.
I know I'll get you soon enough.
-----
I followed you as you walked to the school gate today.
You did not notice me. Perhaps I was too inconspicuous. Or you were just too engrossed with him, staring at you from far away.
* * *
I sat on one of the stone benches. From my vantage point, I could see him and her, flirting, obviously, and you, hurting inside.
I was more concerned with how you have been trying to deny what you really feel. The moment you learned from me that word was he and she were getting along well, I wanted to take the news back. I just needed to be honest, because you asked. You pretended you didn't care but everyday since, I know it bothered you.
* * *
She leaned closer to him. An obvious gesture to catch your attention. She bumped his shoulder. A desperate attempt to catch his. For he wasn't listening. He was talking to you silently. And you were to him, too. But I was having second thoughts if I should tell you that this was so.
* * *
We were study buddies. We tirelessly talk about algebra, functions and equations, physics, and all, until one day, you told me you were feeling unusually jittery and well, happy. I found out sooner that it was he who caused these. So I urged you to give it a try, give it a chance. Who knows, you and he, however from different worlds, are meant to be.
I was happy when you slowly accepted that it could be so. You were happier every time you gave me updates- a welcome break from the computations and memorizations we used to busy ourselves with.
When you suddenly stopped.
* * *
Did I say anything that hurt you? I swear I just wanted to be honest. You deserve someone who would treat you better than he who plays your heart. This way you would hurt less. But I guess I was wrong.
Is there hope that we pick up where we left off?
* * *
Today, seeing you bearing your hurt alone, I just wish we could talk Algebra and Physics again. I have not sent you any signal to save you from him. You never knew how long it took me to accept that getting hurt at your stories of him is the best, just to see you smile and laugh.
I looked as you walked past them.
You walked past me. No glance, too.
Now there is little chance that you will know it has always been you. / by Volturi
